Boil pasta until al dente. Salt that water like you mean it. Drain and set aside.
Press tofu and slice into strips or cubes. Season with paprika, garlic powder, cayenne, onion powder, salt, and pepper.
Sauté tofu in olive oil over medium heat until golden and crispy on the edges—like little spicy pillows.
Blend soaked cashews, water, garlic, lemon juice, nutritional yeast, and salt until smooth and creamy.
Pour sauce into skillet, heat gently, and stir until warm and thick. Don’t boil it—this isn’t soup.
Toss pasta in the sauce, making sure it’s coated like it’s going out on a date.
Top with Cajun tofu, fresh parsley, and a sprinkle of sass. Serve hot and watch jaws drop.
