Toss vegan chicken with olive oil, paprika, salt, and pepper. Grill for 3–4 minutes each side until crisp and golden.
Soak cashews in hot water for 30 minutes or until they’re softer than your last situationship.
Blend soaked cashews, water, lemon juice, mustard, garlic, oil, nutritional yeast, capers, salt, and pepper until creamy.
Preheat oven to 375°F (or use toaster oven). Toss bread cubes with oil, garlic powder, and oregano.
Bake croutons 10–12 minutes until crisp and golden like your highlight reel.
Assemble salad with chopped romaine, grilled chick’n, and cherry tomatoes.
Drizzle with homemade dressing like you’re on a cooking show with something to prove.
Top with crunchy croutons and prepare for the applause.